Contents of the Winter, 2010 issue Ace Miller Hoopla! 2010 ~ Sunday, Feb. 28 Help for Headache Sufferers On the Cutting Edge Long Term Care Facilities – Lipids – the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly Forgetfulness: It’s Not Always What You Think Lifestyle Changes, Medication Medicare's "Doughnut Hole" Drug Coverage Gap Living with Parkinson’s Disease Sugar to Blame for Obesity Epidemic 2010 Census Year is Coming - Be Alert When You Can’t Swallow Your Pride Ask Susie Passport Calendar of Events Excel in 2010! Passport Travels 2010

Ace Miller Taking on His Senior Years Like a Champ If you had known Ace Miller when he was a teenager, you might have doubted he would have a fighting chance at a happy or successful life. But now in his “golden years,” he can surely say he’s won plenty of life’s matches. Miller took over the Knoxville Golden Gloves amateur boxing program in 1963 and has seen hundreds of young men (and quite a few young women!) become better people with the disciplines they’ve learned at the Chilhowee Park arena. Golden Gloves has a goal of providing youth with physical activity that will promote physical and emotional well-being and social development. Ace Miller has done such a good job of carrying out that mission that he was inducted into the Golden Gloves Hall of Fame in the year 2000. He says a key to the success of the program is the relationship the coaches build with the fighters along the way, winning the young athletes’ confidence with unconditional love. Then, they are teachable. And you can bet they learn more than fancy footwork. “Let’s teach social skills. Let’s make them better guys,” Miller says. Telling athletes to keep their “pants up, shirts down, and keep it clean,” Miller has shepherded plenty of kids toward a better adulthood. When he was just two years old, Miller says his parents “took off” and he was left to be raised by grandparents. They were a “sensational couple,” he says, but he didn’t appreciate them when he was a kid. A high school drop-out who was planning to be a professional pool player, Miller says he had a “hoodlum mentality” in his teen years. While he regrets decisions he made during those years, he doesn’t wallow in “what ifs.” “If you take the ‘if’ out of ‘life’ you won’t have a word,” shrugs Miller. The switch from billiards to boxing was certainly unplanned. When Miller was growing up, boxing was a popular sport. Legends like Rocky Marciano and Joe Lewis burned up the radio with their intense matches, and every kid Miller knew was boxing. “I’ve been beat up, whipped, my nose bloodied,” Miller recalls. “I wasn’t very good at it.” He says his brother was the better boxer, learning how to beat bigger opponents. So how did the not-so-promising teenager turn into a beloved leader for so many young athletes? How did he get off the streets? “God Almighty and the police officers in the community of Knoxville,” Miller says without hesitation. “They would stand on the side of the road, smack you on the head, and tell you to go home.” He also credits an upbringing in church. While Miller doesn’t do a lot of smacking kids on the head, he does give them firm discipline coupled with encouragement – and bravery. “I’ve been confronted. I’ve talked my way out of being beat to death or shot in this building,” Miller says. “God has a plan for everybody.” Miller will be the first to tell you that he’s not superhuman. He deals with the same hindrances as any other man his age. But he has a well-defined purpose and a drive to keep going. In 1999, Miller suffered three heart attacks and says the resulting trauma is hard to describe. “It haunts you. You wake up with it,” Miller says. “I can’t physically do what I did five or ten years ago. My body won’t let me. Somehow God always provides.” Believing that you “reap what you sow,” Miller says he hasn’t made much money in his lifetime, but he is rich in friends. He is also well-respected by the many whose lives have been improved by his leadership and friendship. “We don’t win every battle,” Miller concedes. “But if you can win one, you’ve earned your salary ten times over.” And when it comes to making friends and making a difference Ace Miller is a champion, indeed.

Hoopla! 2010 ~ Sunday, Feb. 28 Our annual event is back and better than ever! This year’s outing has been kicked up a notch with better seating and a fabulous hot lunch. You will feel like part of the action in Level 200 seating! Register early; seating is limited to the first 100 Passport members that call. Registration is $30 and includes a tour of the Women’s Basketball Hall of Fame (exhibits change regularly), hot soup and sandwich bar, private pep rally with UT cheerleaders, a tour of Pratt Pavilion (the basketball practice facility), transportation to and from the game, and game tickets. Call 541-4500 to make your reservations today.

Help for Headache Sufferers Tension, migraine, or sinus – not all headaches are created equally. There are over 100 classifications of headaches. The causes are even more varied. Causes can include hormones, infections, eye strain or allergies. More serious causes include hypertension, stroke or brain tumors. Because there are so many types of headaches, finding the right treatment can be difficult. Talk to your doctor if you suffer from chronic headaches (three or more a month). Prepare for your appointment by keeping a headache diary: • note the day and time, • how long did the headache last, • describe the pain (throbbing, blinding, stabbing, etc.), • list possible triggers (certain foods, odors, changes in weather), • record any medications you take and the effectiveness. Seek emergency treatment if you experience a headache caused by a head injury or if you start to suffer from “the worst headache of your life.” You can learn more on Wednesday, Jan. 20 as Elzbieta Gornisiewicz, MD, a neurologist at Methodist Medical Center, discusses causes and treatments at First Presbyterian Church in Oak Ridge. Call 483-1318 to reserve a seat.

On the Cutting Edge “What’s Going on Down There?” Many people think that urinary incontinence (UI) is a natural part of aging. While it is true that getting older is a risk factor, UI isn’t inevitable. Almost 40 percent of people over 65 do experience some bladder leakage. That is almost 11 million people, 85 percent of whom are women. The good news is that UI can be cured or controlled in most cases. Pelvic floor dysfunction is actually a group of conditions that include UI, fecal incontinence, pelvic organ prolapse and sometimes chronic pain. UI is an embarrassing and emotional disorder and can even lead to depression. You don’t have to suffer in silence. UI is the loss of bladder control, usually caused by an underlying problem. It may be caused by physical changes during pregnancy, childbirth or menopause, a urinary tract infection, or damage to the nervous system. We always hear “Do your Kegel exercises.” These exercises are a safe way to improve control of the pelvic muscles but they must be done correctly to have a positive effect. Biofeedback can help. Working with a physical therapist to isolate and work the appropriate muscles can help alleviate many of the symptoms associated with pelvic floor dysfunction. There are many new treatments available to treat UI. Talk to your doctor before you become resigned to bladder leakage. If you would like to learn more about biofeedback, join Joy Friley, physical therapist with Parkwest Therapy Center, as she discusses how biofeedback works and how it can help you. Call 541-4500 to register. Registration is $5 for Passport members and includes a boxed lunch.

Long Term Care Facilities – what do you do when something doesn’t seem right? Ombudsman (om-buh dz-muhn) -- a person who investigates and attempts to resolve complaints and problems. Aging baby boomers have been changing the landscape and culture of America for over half a century. As we age, alternatives exist that our forefathers didn’t have. So many choices exist now: adult day care, home care, assisted living, residential homes for the aged and continuing care retirement communities. Even with all these choices, no one looks forward to entering a nursing home. Many stereotypes and anxieties still exist about moving into a long-term care facility (LTCF). Did you know if you or a loved one stays in LTCF, you have someone on your side? The Older Americans Act created a network of advocates for residents of LTCFs. Each facility has a person that is assigned to provide advocacy for the residents of that facility and to protect the rights of those residents. These include: • The right to citizenship, dignity and privacy • Freedom from abuse and neglect • Freedom from restraints • Information on services and fees According to Cindy Troyer, district long-term care ombudsman for East Tennessee, the patient advocate is “the best kept secret” in long term care. The ombudsman is available to help individuals and families resolve problems in an LTCF. The ombudsman is not an employee of the facility or an employee of the state agency responsible for inspecting the facility. In most cases, it is a trained volunteer whose primary purpose is the investigation and resolution of problems on behalf of the resident in a care facility. Concerns might include anything from abuse and neglect to what time a residents is wakened each day or a bathing schedule. Every resident has a care plan and has the right to participate in the preparation of that care plan. The ombudsman can help with questions about care or charges for that care. They can help with the admissions process or helping clarify regulations that apply to your situation. Each situation is handled confidentially unless the resident gives other instructions. The name and contact information for your ombudsman is posted at each facility. If you have questions you can contact Cindy Troyer at (865) 691-2551 x4223. SideBar: Would you want to be a Volunteer Ombudsman? Qualifications: -You feel a concern for patients in nursing homes or other LTCF -You are mature, assertive person - You want a challenging, responsible experience Call your district ombudsman at (865) 691-2551 x4223 for more information.

Lipids – the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly Did you know that cholesterol is in every cell in your body? That’s not a bad thing. Cholesterol is important for digestion, making hormones, synthesizing vitamin D, maintaining cell membranes, learning, memory and sleep. You have two types of cholesterol in your body: LDL (the bad kind) and HDL (the good kind). Having too much of one and not enough of the other is why cholesterol gets a bad rap. Having high cholesterol generally means that there is more LDLs in the blood than HDLs. When you have high cholesterol, a fatty substance builds up on the walls of your arteries, forming plaque. This makes the arteries hard and narrow, putting you at risk for heart attack and stroke. Your liver produces about 1000 mg of cholesterol per day, pretty much what it needs to operate. You add some through food. If you add a little “healthy” fat, there usually isn’t a problem. But eating food high in saturated fats and trans fats can overload the body with too much fat. Genetics play in important part in fat regulation in the body. But many environmental factors are just as important. • Being overweight or obese puts you at a higher risk of developing high cholesterol. • Smoking damages the walls of your arteries and can lower your levels of HDL (the good stuff). • Eating the southern way – red meat, fried foods, yummy desserts – will increase your total cholesterol. • Chronic health problems, high blood pressure, and diabetes can damage the arteries. If your cholesterol levels are too high, many doctors recommend starting with dietary changes and adding exercise. For those that are overweight, losing even a few pounds can help lower cholesterol levels. The following tips should help lower your levels of bad cholesterol: • Add fiber through whole grains, fruits and vegetables. Find a way to cook your vegetables besides frying them. • If a fat is solid at room temperature, use a limited amount. Use a little olive, peanut or canola instead. If you miss the flavor frying gives food, add some spices instead. • If a food labels says “trans fat,” put it back on the grocery store shelf. • Drink in moderation (one drink per day for women, two for men) and stop smoking. • Exercise 30 to 60 minutes per day. Housework and gardening count only if you are breaking a little sweat. Learn more as David Navorksa, MD, talks about how to control your cholesterol at a Lunch & Learn at the Frank Strang Senior Center on Wednesday, March 3. Call 541-4500 to reserve a seat. SIDEBAR: High cholesterol has no symptoms. You won’t know you have it without a fasting blood test. A lipid profile will give you your total cholesterol, LDL, HDL, and triglycerides. If you want to know your numbers, Covenant Health’s Center for Community Health will provide screenings at the Strang Center on March 3 from 8 – 10 a.m. The cost is $20 and results will be available before the Lunch & Learn. Call 541-4500 to schedule a time.

Forgetfulness: It’s Not Always What You Think Passport presents program on memory loss Memory loss and confusion happen to people of all ages, not just seniors. But seniors tend to worry more about forgetfulness when it happens. Many people believe that forgetting a few things might be the first sign of Alzheimer’s disease. This is not the case. Some causes of memory loss are serious and others are not. Some conditions that cause dementia can be reversed while others cannot. Reversible conditions include high fever, dehydration, poor nutrition, reactions to medications, and problems with a thyroid gland. Emotional problems such as depression or anxiety can also lead to forgetfulness. Some physical conditions such as Alzheimer’s disease or vascular disease are not reversible. Even if the diagnosis is irreversible, early stage diagnosis can possibly delay the worsening of some symptoms and allow a support system to be in place. To find out more join Susie Wilson, LCSW, on Monday, Feb. 22 at the South Knoxville Senior Center. Call 541-4500 to reserve a seat.

Lifestyle Changes, Medication High blood pressure has been called a “silent killer” because there are no symptoms. The only way to detect it is to have it checked. If it’s high, have it checked regularly and work with your doctor to get it under control. That’s the advice of Methodist Medical Center’s newest multi-boarded and fellowship-trained cardiologists, Margaret Happel, MD, and Donna Adams, MD. “Lifestyle changes can go a long way toward controlling your blood pressure,” Dr. Happel said. “These changes may include losing weight, exercising regularly, reducing your salt intake and giving up smoking. You also may need to take one or more prescription medications.” Weight control is important because obesity causes and aggravates a number of health problems including high blood pressure and cardiovascular disease, noted Dr. Adams. “Typically, the goal of weight loss should be to lose 10 percent of your weight within a six-month period,” she said. “If you’re considering the use of diet pills, talk to your doctor before taking them. Most of these drugs contain caffeine-type stimulants that can increase your blood pressure and cause abnormal heart rhythms.” Regular exercise has been shown to reduce high blood pressure and prevent heart disease. However, Drs. Happel and Adams emphasized that older adults should talk to their doctor before beginning any type of exercise program. “Exercise does not have to be complicated, but it should be consistent,” Dr. Happel said. “It can be a structured activity such as a class or regular workouts at a gym, or it can be unstructured, such as walking, dancing or gardening.” Reducing your salt intake is important, as well, but it can be difficult because salt hides in many processed foods. Fresh fruits and vegetables are good choices, while condiments, pickles, ham, bacon, salsa, cheese, cold cuts, olives, broths and many canned goods are not. Check the sodium content on food labels and think twice about eating anything that contains more than 100 milligrams of sodium per serving. Smoking cessation can have a significant impact on blood pressure, Dr. Adams said. “People who stop smoking can dramatically reduce their risk of heart attack, stroke, lung cancer, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease and several other serious conditions.” The cardiologists encouraged people with high blood pressure to find ways to reduce stress, whether it’s doing yoga, listening to music, walking, reading or enjoying some other activity. Be careful about taking over-the-counter medicines that contain vasoconstrictors, such as eye drops, decongestants and antihistamines. Limit your use of saunas, steam baths, heated whirlpools and hot tubs because these activities can increase blood pressure to dangerous levels. “When lifestyle changes do not adequately control blood pressure, your doctor may prescribe medication,” Dr. Happel added. “Take your medicine exactly as directed, and make certain you don’t run out of it, even for a day.” What’s Normal? A blood pressure reading consists of two numbers, the systolic and diastolic pressures, which are written one above or before the other. A reading of 120/80 or lower is considered normal and a reading of 140/90 or higher indicates high blood pressure.

Medicare's "Doughnut Hole" Drug Coverage Gap By Christopher Norris, Pharm. D., Fort Sanders Regional Medical Center The Medicare Part D “Doughnut Hole” refers to the medication coverage gap which begins when elderly recipients amass a certain amount of drug expenses. This amount is set at $2830 for 2010. Coverage starts back up after recipients pay all of the next $3600 in drug costs (at which time, including deductibles and co-pays, recipients have paid a total of $4550 out-of-pocket). According to AARP, 26 percent of Medicare recipients enrolled in Part D plans fall into the doughnut hole each year. Follow these tips to help reduce your out-of -pocket expenses: • Use lower-cost drugs which will make your initial coverage last longer. Ask your doctor if generics or less-expensive brand-name drugs would work for you. Choosing these drugs could also reduce your co-pays. (For information on how similar drugs compare in effectiveness, go to http://www.consumerreports.org/health/best-buy-drugs/index.htm). • AARP offers an online doughnut hole calculator (http://doughnuthole.aarp.org/) which, based on your plan and medications, allows you to view a chart for the year to see if you’re likely to hit the doughnut hole. From there, you can explore a list of alternative drugs that are therapeutically similar, but which could reduce your expenses and stretch your coverage. There is also a printable form letter to ask your doctor whether switching to the lower-cost drug(s) would work for you. • Consider a drug plan with coverage in the doughnut hole. You’ll need to compare plans carefully according to the specific drugs you take to see whether plans offering coverage in the doughnut hole are worth the extra premium costs (http://www.medicare.gov). Very few plans cover brand-name drugs in the gap. Most cover only generics. • While in the doughnut hole, you can continue to get drugs through your plan at the discounts it has negotiated. Your plan will track your expenses so they count toward the out-of-pocket limit. In the doughnut hole, you may find drugs elsewhere that are less expensive than your plan charges. You can buy these if you wish, but under Medicare rules only drugs purchased at pharmacies within your plan’s network count toward the limit. • If you have Medicare and have a limited income and resources, you may be eligible for the Medicare Extra Help Program. Find out if you qualify by going to www.benefitscheckup.org. If you qualify, you will have low or no deductible, low or no premiums, no doughnut hole, and will pay much less for your prescriptions. • If you can’t afford the cost of your drugs and don’t have additional insurance (for example, from an employer plan, a state pharmacy assistance program or the Extra Help Program) that pays some or all of your costs in the doughnut hole, you may consider other (non-insurance) sources of help. These include 1) free or low cost drugs from assistance programs run by pharmaceutical manufacturers and 2) free or low-cost drugs supplied by local medical clinics, charities or patients’ organizations.

Living with Parkinson’s Disease Passport presents Lunch & Learn on Feb. 3 It usually starts with a mild tremor, a slight shaking of a hand. As the disease progresses, muscles become rigid, balance is affected, and “freezing” can occur. Parkinson’s Disease (PD) is a progressive disorder of the central nervous system, affecting more than 1.5 million Americans. Not everyone experiences the same symptoms and the disease does not progress in everyone the same way. There is no cure for Parkinson’s, but there are medicines that help control the symptoms. Physical therapy is helpful in helping maintain movement and balance. For some patients, surgery may be beneficial. To learn more about how to cope with PD, Bruce LeForce, MD, will lead this important program at the Frank Strang Senior Center. Call 541-4500 to reserve a seat.

Sugar to Blame for Obesity Epidemic Curbing Southern Habits Takes Effort Americans are infamous for wanting immediate satisfaction, and that doesn’t stop at the dinner table. Over the years we have developed a large appetite for sweet foods. According to the American Heart Association, most adults consume an average of 355 calories a day in added sugars. Sugars are sprinkled on and hidden in processed foods, beverages and condiments. AHA experts say that overloading on sugars could be the root cause of the surge in obesity rates. Tennessee ranks fourth in states with the highest adult obesity rates. Obesity and obesity-related diseases such as diabetes and hypertension continue to remain the highest in the Southern states. Living in the South, we have cultural influences that support this addiction to sugar. For example, when was the last time you declined a glass of sweet tea? “Regular soft drinks and sweet tea are like liquid candy” said Parkwest Clinical Dietitian Laurie Plachinski. “One 12-ounce soft drink contains nine teaspoons of sugar and 150 calories. Liquid calories don’t satisfy your hunger like food does, so sweet beverages provide additional calories, without any nutritional benefit.” Plachinski said to consider eliminating just one soft drink a day to lose 15 pounds in one year. Ten southern sugar traps: Baked beans: An average of six teaspoons of added sugar are in a one-cup serving of home-style baked beans. Candy Corn: Just 22 pieces contain seven teaspoons of sugar. Little Debbie® Swiss Roll: Two of these cake rolls contain almost seven teaspoons of sugar. Ketchup: This American favorite is spread on and dipped on most anything. Just a quarter of a cup contains four teaspoons of sugar. Lemonade: An eight ounce glass contains six and a half teaspoons of sugar. McDonald’s® Sweet Tea: Almost 15 teaspoons of sugar are in a large (32 ounce) size. Moon Pie®: Three teaspoons of sugar are in a chocolate moon pie. Original Glazed Krispy Kreme® donut: This southern chain’s signature hot-n-ready donut has two and a half teaspoons of sugar. Pecan Pie: One piece (an eighth of a nine-inch pie) contains eight teaspoons of sugar. Kellogg’s® Brown Sugar Cinnamon Pop Tarts®: Two pastries (one packet) contain six and a half teaspoons of sugar. Beware: Sugar is disguised Sugar isn’t always simply listed as sugar on packages. It also lurks on labels as: Corn syrup Dextrose Fructose Galactose Glucose High fructose corn syrup Honey Lactose Malt Maltodextrin Maltose Maple syrup Molasses Panocha Rice syrup Sucrose

2010 Census Year is Coming - Be Alert “People -- especially seniors -- who are more vulnerable to scams need to be cautious about giving information to census workers.” According to Becca Montgomery, CEO/President of the Covenant Health Credit Union, “With the U.S. Census process beginning, the Better Business Bureau (BBB) advises people to be cooperative, but cautious, so as not to become a victim of fraud or identity theft.” The first phase of the 2010 U.S. Census is underway, and workers have begun verifying the addresses of households across the country. Eventually, more than 140,000 U.S. Census workers will count every person in the United States and will gather information about every person living at each address including name, age, gender, race, and other relevant data. The big question is - How do you tell the difference between a U.S. Census worker and a con artist? The Better Business Bureau (BBB) offers the following: 1. Census workers will carry a badge, a hand-held device, a Census Bureau canvas bag, and a confidentiality notice. Make sure to ask them for their badge and identification before talking to them! 2. Census workers will NOT ask for Social Security numbers, bank account numbers, credit card numbers, or any specific account information! Do not give your Social Security number, credit card or banking information to anyone, even if they claim they need it for the U.S. Census. 3 Census workers will NOT solicit for donations – do not give anyone any money! 4. Census workers will NOT contact you by e-mail – do not respond to anyone claiming to be with the US Census by email! Never click on a link or open any attachments in an email that are supposedly from the U.S. Census Bureau. 5. Don’t invite them into your homes! If you feel threatened in any way or feel that you are being scammed, close and lock your door and contact the police department. You can also contact the BBB with any complaints about the census workers.

When You Can’t Swallow Your Pride Have you ever felt as if you were trying to swallow a golf ball? Most have experienced a “lump in the throat” during a particularly stressful situation. However, for some, it is a more common sensation. In addition to the health impact on nutrition and hydration, swallowing difficulties can result in isolation and fear, since many social outings revolve around eating. The medical term is dysphagia (dis-fae-juh). Recent studies indicate that 10-15% of seniors suffer from some form of swallowing disorder. Many remain undiagnosed until the condition becomes severe and requires a feeding tube. Dysphagia is often treatable and preventable, but first it must be diagnosed. Patients need to be aware that: • Swallowing difficulties are not a natural result of aging and should be discussed with a physician • There are severe consequences to ignoring early stage symptoms of dysphagia as mere “nuisance” • Help is readily available. The clinical specialty dealing with swallowing issues is speech-language pathology Dysphagia can manifest itself in many different ways such as coughing fits, choking, pain, the sensation of a closed-off throat, and other problems. While seniors comprise the majority of patients, the disorder can affect people of all ages. Dysphagia has a variety of causes including neurological trauma, surgery, medication side effects, or other illnesses. Tonya Connell, MA, CCC-SLP with Parkwest Therapy Center at Fort Sanders West, is one of several speech-language pathologists within the Covenant Health system who specialize in the treatment of dysphagia. Connell explains that careful evaluation of the exact cause and problem are critical in determining the treatment recommendation. “Typically the first step is a swallowing study, where a video x-ray taken while swallowing different consistencies of food and liquid. Dysphagia could occur at the oral stage, pharyngeal stage, or at the esophageal stage of the swallow and is triggered by different things in different people. That is why treatment plans are very individualized. However, rehabilitation of the swallowing process is often very successful and patients are thrilled with the improvement of their quality of life” says Connell. Dysphagia patients are often given daily exercises to improve the function of the affected mouth or throat muscles. Speech-language pathologists might also use therapies such as vital stimulation, which involves using small electrodes on specific muscle areas, or deep pharyngeal neuromuscular stimulation, which uses firm pressure in addition to taste and temperature to stimulate swallowing nerves. Dysphagia can be devastating initially, but there are many treatment options. For information about Connell’s dysphagia treatment program, contact Parkwest Therapy Center at (865)531-5710. For information about dysphagia treatment throughout Covenant Health, contact (865) 541-4500.

Ask Susie Dear Susie, I don’t know what to do anymore. My youngest child, Terry, has always needed me more, emotionally and financially. I feel I have always treated all my children equally; my other children are very independent and just haven’t needed me as much. Now it seems to have become an issue. My other children seem to resent Terry. Holidays are difficult because Terry feels excluded and everyone walks on eggshells trying to keep Terry from getting upset. I admit, I want to keep the peace but my methods don’t seem to be working anymore. The holidays were very uncomfortable for all of us. Help! Mental Mom Dear Mental, My guess is that the onset of resentment from your older children isn’t as sudden as you imagine. Kids of all ages pay attention to what goes on between their parents and “the competition,” and they become concerned when they believe a sibling may be exploiting a parent. Research on the topic affirms that when money is involved, a parent being “needed” by one child more than the others creates significant tension among siblings. When the issues are not addressed, disapproval can blossom into estrangement and bad karma that may follow mom and dad beyond the grave. There are many circumstances where an adult child may legitimately need more emotional and financial help from a parent than his siblings. It’s important to examine those needs and weigh the consequences of helping very carefully. Are you enabling ongoing dependence? Could “needing me more” be a means of fulfilling your needs to nurture and care? A respectable body of research finds that parents do indeed treat their kids differently, and prefer the company of one child to others. In grown children, this has a lot to do with gender (most often, girls are favored), authentic health concerns, proximity, marital status, and younger age. Parents also provide more help to kids from whom they have received more help. [Suitor, J. Jill, Karl Pillemer and Jori Sechrist 2006.] To suggest that yours is a case of “empty nest” or “failure to launch” is to oversimplify complex dynamics. However, when an adult child has ongoing and comparatively greater “needs,” there is often more to the story. If this fits for your situation consider some counseling for yourself and for Terry to clarify the deeper issues and chart a course that will empower you both toward more age-appropriate and developmentally appropriate support. About that family togetherness: Peacekeeping methods such as walking on eggshells can start to feel a whole lot like chewing on eggshells when nobody’s telling the truth. Invite your children to get verbal about their feelings and concerns. Ask out loud, ”How can we make it better?” Encourage them to take ownership for their roles in the conflict and responsibility for making family time worth showing up for. Agreeing to leave baggage at the door can be a start. I do hope the siblings won’t give up on Terry. Freezing him out at family gatherings only undermines his tenuous self-esteem. When we can clear the stage of childhood/childlike drama, siblings have great role model and friendship potential. All families experience some level of “drama.” If you need some guidance on how to handle yours, call Peninsula Behavioral Health for a referral. (865) 970-9800. Susie Stiles Wilson, LCSW, is on the staff of Covenant Senior Health.

Passport Calendar of Events January 4 is Clean Desk Day. It’s a great way to start the New Year! Jan. 6, noon Biofeedback Treatment for Urinary Incontinence Lunch & Learn Joy Friley, PT Frank Strang Senior Center Jan. 11, 6-7 p.m. Freedom From Smoking Fort Sanders Sevier Senior Center $50 refundable deposit $25 materials fee Call 453-WELL to register Jan. 20, noon Headaches in Seniors Elzbieta Gornisiewicz, MD First Presbyterian Church, Oak Ridge Call 483-1318 Jan. 27, 8:30 – 11 a.m. Total Cholesterol and Glucose Screening Fort Sanders Sevier Senior Center $20.00 by appointment Call 453-WELL to register Jan. 27, noon New Year's Resolutions & Weight Loss Lunch & Learn Covenant Weight Management Center Jan. 28 & 29 by appointment StrokeScore and More at Methodist $100 Call 541-4500 for an appointment February 16 is Pistachio Day. This little nut is full of minerals, fiber, protein and heart-healthy fat. Feb. 1 & 2, 9 a.m. – 1 p.m. AARP Driver Safety Class Cedar Springs Presbyterian Church $12 for AARP members, $14 for others Feb. 3, noon Living with Parkinson’s Disease Lunch & Learn Bruce LeForce, MD Frank Strang Senior Center Feb. 8, 8:30 a.m. - 3:30 p.m. Intro to Excel Rod Collins Covenant Health Learning and Leadership Development Office Feb. 17, noon Nutrition Lunch Marie Keith, xxx (???) First Presbyterian Church, Oak Ridge Call 483-1318 Feb 22, noon “What am I Forgetting?” Lunch & Learn Susie Wilson, LCSW South Knoxville Senior Center Feb. 24, noon Non-Invasive Therapy for Heart Patients Lunch & Learn Gregory Brewer, MD March 20 is Barbie Doll Day. This beauty was “born” in 1959, making her eligible to be a Passport member. March 3, noon Fats: the Good, the Bad and the Ugly Lunch & Learn David Navorksa, MD Frank Strang Senior Center March 19, 8 a.m.-11 a.m. Pigeon Forge Health Check Pigeon Forge Community Center March 24 & 31 by appointment StrokeScore and More Screening LeConte Medical Center $100.00 Call 453-WELL for an appointment March 24, noon Shoulder Problems Lunch & Learn Chris Shaver, MD Frank Strang Senior Center You can call 541-4500 or the number listed to register for any of these programs. All Lunch & Learns are $5 for Passport members

Excel in 2010! It seems that every year around tax time, we say to ourselves “I will be more organized next year.” Passport has a great way to get started! On Feb. 8, our Learning and Leadership Development department will offer Introduction to Excel just for Passport members. The Windows Excel program can be the toughest to learn for those who don’t have a financial background. But in just a few hours, you can become the master of your finances. You’ll learn how to set up a spreadsheet, how to create formulas, and add professional touches so they look great! Tuition for the class is $30 and includes materials and lunch. Call 541-4500 to enroll.

Passport Travels 2010 Happy New Year from Faye, ‘Moe’ & Katie! We have an exciting year planned for 2010! Traveling opens up a world of new friends and experiences! If space is available, you can still make reservations for the RCCL Cruise-Jan. 22, and PASSION PLAY in Oberammergau, Germany-May 23. Must call immediately for space. Feb. 23, Cherokee, NC; Harrah’s Casino, Cherokee, NC March. 19-20, Chattanooga; TN; Delta Queen Riverboat and more Apr. 1, Wytheville, VA; Wohlfahrt Haus Dinner Theater, ‘Sound of Music’ Apr. 19-20, Rising Sun, IN; Grand Victoria Casino Apr. 29-May 1, Southwestern Virginia; Quilt Rally at 6 quilt shops. Win major door prizes! Quilters and seamstresses, call for details. May 15, Rugby, TN; Festival of British & Appalachian Culture along with Alvin York Home. June 17-19, Shop Hop in East Tennessee; Fifteen quilting shops with a chance to win door prizes. June 24, Mystery Trip; Guess where we are going this year! Mark your calendars now for the following informational events: • Jan. 16, 2:30 p.m; Preview of the 2010 Travel Season; Church of the Good Samaritan; 425 N Cedar Bluff; Knoxville, TN. The best place to get information about all 2010 trips. Presentation, door-prizes, discounts, refreshments & entertainment. • Feb. 6, 1:30 p.m; Information and sign-up for Colorado Rockies trip Aug. 25-Sept. 7, and the Splendors of the Nile trip in Egypt from Nov. 3-14; Ramada Inn, 7737 Kingston Pike, Knoxville, TN. Get all the details and guarantee your space on the trips. (Note: If you cannot make this meeting, call us at 865-577-4643 and we will mail you brochures.) Group travel is a wonderfully enjoyable and affordable recreational activity for seniors. Come join the fun! Contact us at: MoeFaye Travel, Inc. 865-577-4643, or e-mail to Moefayetravel@aol.com, or on the web at www.covenantpassport.com then pick the “Travel” icon. SideBar: Whether you are hitting the road with Moe and Faye or discovering some new destinations on your own, sign up for an AARP Driver Safety Class. Many auto insurance companies will offer a discount on rates upon completion. Call 541-4500 to find a class near you.